Hey, what’s that I see? Why, it’s a SEASON! A REAL LIVE SEASON OF ‘THE VOICE’!
For a solid month now, Danielle Bradbery has been pencilled in as the shoe-in winner of season 4. Thanks to her dominance of the iTunes charts and the show’s silly rule to make iTunes votes cumulative in the finale, Danielle has built a lead that appeared insurmountable.
But lo, a challenger emerges! Thanks to Blake gradually squeezing the life out of this season with his sledgehammer of country music, the non-country competitors have dwindled to the point that the non-country vote is no longer being split a bunch of different ways. With Judith and Sarah gone, suddenly a whole voting bloc of fans was left without an artist to support, and those that stuck with the show appear to have chosen Michelle Chamuel.
Michelle has been slowly closing the gap on Danielle, but this week was her breakthrough. Michelle finished 4th & 16th on iTunes this week compared to Danielle’s 12th & 20th. That 4th place finish – for a BRILLIANTLY selected Taylor Swift song – will severely chip into Danielle’s cumulative iTunes lead, considering neither of Danielle’s performances received the 10x vote multiplier.
Even if you’re rooting for Danielle to pull it out, you’ve got admit that it’s nice to have a little drama – especially after last season turned into the Cassadee Pope coronation for a solid 2-3 months.
Anyway, what’s on tap tonight? All available evidence indicates that Holly Tucker will be going home. Let’s see if it comes to fruition, or if we’re in store for another upset.
-Non-violent Battlebot Carson Daly welcomes us to the results show. We’ve got a full hour to make one single cut tonight. Seems about right. Time killing procedure…initiate!
-Hey Cassadee Pope’s here. I enjoyed Cassadee well enough last season, though I can’t imagine ever listening to her on Spotify. Anyway the show opens with an extended (EX-TEN-DED) recap of last night’s performances.
-Cassadee takes the stage. This song feels very Taylor Swift-y to me. Perfectly fine, though again, not exactly lighting up my Spotify queue. Speaking of ‘perfectly fine’, Cassadee’s not bad to look at. She uses the word “traction” in her interview with Carson. I think Cassadee’s been going to the Blake Shelton school of marketing.
-Time for off-the-cuff interview time. Adam babbles through his love of Amber. He’s been a shell of himself since Judith and Sarah went home. Shakira continues down the ill-advised path of comparing Sasha to Beyonce. Usher gloats about Michelle’s success last night and is now exclusively using “we” to talk about Michelle. Blake nervously stutters like a man who knows Holly Tucker’s going home tonight.
-First duet of the night: Michelle and Sasha team up for a Madonna (???) song. Well, okay, why not. These two have the chemistry of contestants on a singing show who have been forced to sing a Madonna song that neither of them know.
First announcement of the night! Moving on to the SEMI-FINALS is…
Michelle Chamuel! Well, of course. Let’s get Danielle out of the way next, shall we?
-Time for everyone’s favorite segment, “Christina Milian Continues Her Tailspin”. This time featuring Cassadee and Michelle.
-Recap of Blake’s big Oklahoma fundraiser last week. No snark here, obviously.
Announcement time: Moving on to the semis is…
Sasha Allen! She was on the brink of elimination last week, but easily advanced this week thanks to a pair of big performances last night. Credit to Shakira for the Carrie Underwood song choice in particular.
-Carson notes that both new coaches have artists moving on to the top-5. Somewhere, veteran coach Christina Aguilera (who placed exactly zero artists in the top SIX last season) downs a shot of whiskey and quietly seethes.
-Holly and the Swons take the stage. Holly is performing like someone who saw her dire iTunes numbers right before taking the stage. This is the pleasantly mediocre version of the Swons that I can tolerate, as opposed to whatever the hell that was on stage last night.
Next announcement. Advancing to the semifinals is…
Danielle Bradbery! Yeah, okay. Upcoming announcement: the sky is blue.
-Amber and Danielle join up to perform….ETERNAL FLAME?! Is this a joke? Is it trolling? I don’t know what’s going on here. Nothing against The Bangles, OF COURSE, but this is kind of a high school prom song at this point, no?
We’re down to 3! Moving on will be…
Amber Carrington! She wasn’t at risk this week, but it was a relatively lackluster evening for Amber. She’s fallen back into the pack with the Swons and Sasha going into next week.
So, Blake’s finally losing an artist tonight. Not going to lie, it’s nice to see the Swons in the bottom two, even if there’s virtually no chance they go home tonight.
The FINAL act moving on is…
The Swon Brothers. Of course. Aw Swon Brothers, you made Holly cry! LOOK WHAT YOU DID! I hate you, Swon Brothers.
That means we are losing…
Ranked #8 out of 48 following auditions.
Ranked #7 out of 16 entering the live shows.
At one point this season, I wrote that the very best case scenario for Holly was finishing between 6th and 8th, and here we are. After an entire season of performing slow ballads, I’m happy for her that she went down swinging with upbeat numbers, even if it may have been a tactical error. Life’s too short to just sing sad songs, you know? Vocally, I think you can make a convincing case that Holly is just as good as Danielle; but like anything that involves voting, The Voice is in large part a popularity contest, and Holly’s just never developed the kind of following that Danielle has. She was probably headed home a couple weeks ago, but her exceptionally well-received Gospel song bought her more time. She could’ve went back to that well this week and probably advanced, but there’s no need for pandering. Good for Holly, and congratulations to her on a great run.